The weather be stormy...

Hi all,

Well its been a long week. I came down with a pretty nasty chest cold that turned (mutated if I may be so bold) into a bad infection. The other day I went out (as it was the first day I was feeling better) and woke up with an equally nasty hangover. You think something like draft beer would make you feel refreshed!

An hour before I went to work, my girlfriend and I had a long tearful talk which ended in a sad breakup. I had to cut our conversation short since I had to be at work in mere minutes and was saddened further upon realizing that I was out of toothpaste. So, hungover, phlegmy, devastated, and with horrible breath I plodded across the street to work. I was taking solace in the fact that I had a scary Halloween mask (that I'd picked out a week ago)of the Korean monster Gu Mi Ho (who I didn't realize was female). You see, Tuesday was the annual GnB Halloween day, so for 4 hours I could scare the kids with groans whilst hiding my blubbering.

Naturally, like my first day at GnB where they announced within minutes of my arrival that I'd be Santa Claus, I was told moments after arriving at work that I would no longer be Gu Mi Ho but instead would be the lovable GnB mascot 'Bobby'. Bobby and his female counterpart Ginny are the GnB mascots who encourage you to speak English (even though they don't have mouthes themselves- they are hypocrites). The head was huge and very heavy with only styrofoam as my padding/insulation. No peripheral vision and barely any sight save for the 2 crudely cut holes several inches from my eyes. I also had to wear a big puffy layered suit (that was yellow and blue) that had me instantly sweating. It covered every inch of my body (hands and feet too) and zipped up from the back - making a diarrhea anecdote inevitable.



So as I continued to weep hidden from the world the school children came running in and upon seeing me - their little faces lit up! "Ah, life is okay" I smiled as the kids shrieked and came running towards me. Not a moment later a kids fist, connected perfectly with my testicles, as dozens of claws slapped and tore at my head. Kids who came as the devil used their pitchforks to jab at my face whilst twirling them after to use the butt end to hit me. The quicker kids who avoided my flailing hands ready to choke and gauge whoever they caught, ran safely behind me and after making their hands in tiny guns then proceeded to violently shove their hands as far up 'Bobbys' butthole as God has so far allowed their arms to grow. This violent (and hilarious if you witness it happening to others) maneuvere is actually referred to in Korea as a ddong-chim. Dong is 'poo' (shit if you will) and chim is needle. Put the 2 together, add on an extra 'd' in dong and you're ready to go.

I found a link to this game for demonstration sake.

http://www.mikewang.org/dongchim.htm

If you hold down the mouse key for a while your ddong-chimms become much stronger.

So yeah, 4 hours of that. I actually only had to teach one class that day and it was with my 2 favorite students John and Andy. The chapter was all about the weather and used words like deteriorate and evaporate. After they inquired about my dour mood and I explained to them what happened - they know all about my Canadian life - I couldn't help but use the new vocabulary words to describe the recent events in my life - whilst teaching them that the weather- like love - can sometimes be beautiful and other times stormy.

So it was a tough day to say the very least.

I'll be fine though - so unpack your bags mom, no need to fly all the way here.